My life has been like that lately, and I've been experiencing much of the same kind of fear. Things are happening fast, and it terrifies me. A few months ago, we did the Prosperity Project here on these pages. During that exercise, I spent quite a bit of time every day visualizing myself earning increasingly larger amounts of money and using that money to fulfill my heart's desire. I imagined that I earned that money as a writer and keynote speaker, and I imagined how happy I was using that money to support the arts, build an office, and tweak my home space. The project part of the Prosperity Project was designed to test the theory that if we consistently visualize something for one month, we should see some powerful manifestations occurring in our real world. They have, and it's kind of freaking me out.
Since beginning that project, I have been writing consistently for the first time in my life. My writing has been well received, and I find that the more I write, the more ideas I get for writing. I've been in the flow. In the sense that singer's sing and writer's write, I have become a writer. I am beginning to get a clear mental image of what my books will say, and speaking engagements are beginning to open up. I gave my first keynote speech yesterday at the Cocoa Beach Public Library, along with Morgana Starr and Deborah Lee. So now, I am also a speaker, with a clear mental image of my area of expertise. I even have a system in place for securing future speaking engagements that will pay me money while I write the book. The Universe is putting people in my path who are publishers, editors, publicists, webmasters. My Master Mind team is assembling itself. It really is all happening, just as I visualized it during the Prosperity Project.
It's kind of exciting, really. But for the last few days I've been kind of freaking out about it, just as if I were on that roller coaster hurtling towards earth. It's all happening so fast. I know that there will be a price to pay for saying Yes to my dreams. I know that as I move forward, some other things will be left behind. It is already becoming clear that the time I spend at the pool store is really not serving my needs other than earning me a few dollars. Soon, I will be able to leave that job and focus on what I do best. I will love being able to spend that time crafting ideas into words, and I will also love traveling all over the world while I do it. But I also know that in order to travel the world I will have to leave my home, and I think I'm afraid that home won't be here when I get back.
I've always been terrified of success. Non-success is just so comfortable. It's what I know. It's warm and certain. In the past, when things started going right for me, I would always do something to mess it up. I was very self-destructive that way. This time, though, I know that I won't do that. I am strong now, and ready to begin my life. But in order to do that, I have to step out of my comfortable space and just trust that everything will work itself out to the highest good of all persons, places, and situations involved. I have to just go with the flow, and enjoy the speed of the ride.
So, I've chosen to think about it in a different way, in a way that doesn't make me so afraid. I've decided to change my attitude about the magnitude of all the impending changes I'm about to encounter. Instead of comparing it to a roller coaster ride, being pulled about by a soulless mechanical automaton, I will imagine myself being carried along by a rushing current of living water. I've been whitewater rafting before. It was exhilarating. I loved it! Unlike a roller coaster where you are completely at the mercy of the machinery, whitewater rafting allows you to have paddles. Although the water you are riding on is carrying you downriver with incredible force, you are able to influence your course by planning ahead and making necessary adjustments. Now, that I can smile about!
It's amazing how a slight change in perception can change the quality of our lives. As my friend Steve likes to say, point of view is everything.
See, here is where "be carefull what you ask for" comes in. The mind is the most powerful tool there is when used in conjunction with the universe because, believe it or not, the universe ALWAYS listens!
ReplyDeleteSo, before asking the universe for something, make sure you know what it is you are asking for because the universe listens and delivers every single time and you will get what you asked for!